sobbing super badly at this timing.why am i sobbing like a donkey??? shouldnt i be happy about it that his truth colour come out??? feeling ultra upsad about it. not the first time and he did it again. he say he will control but why this incident keep repeating non-stop?? why keep happening to me??? why am i always be the one giving in and not you?? i start to asked myself whether are you the right person for me after we had been so long. wandering whether could i survive without you. cos i am so use to it that we had been around me for the year we are together. but i had enough of all the nonsense and i could take it anymore. it hurt to say or type it out. you know the pain in me has been long-lasted to become a scar?? the pain that i gone through you will never understand and feel it. i am scared and so scared i might lose you oneday and always does what you like and dont but ended up i had all the shitty stuff back. is this how you treated me? and this is how i feel isnt it? did you ever asked yourself how well you treated me and what are the things you had done for me that i could really remember real hard in my mind? didnt i have the right to say you when i felt that you are wrong?but am i ended up have this shitty thing?? i am just a women that is very simple and i dun need you to be committed so much if you couldnt. o felt like a fool around you alright. i big fool.super big fool. when coming to family issue, coming to relationship coming to school work and working I guess i am totally a failure. couldnt i speak up for myself sometime? speaking up always the big issue for me. communication to me is just a stupid thing. nonetheless,in my hEart i always hope you will cherish me more and realised that i am actually i am really a gal that you can spend the rest of your life with, not only that i am capabilities in both financial and responsibilities too. i always work hard to the things that i am doing always have optimistic mindset but you know what i always feel empty and lonely when i cant turn to anyone. yes, i do have friends around me which is very supportive but i always wanted to lighten their burden and not adding on to their burden. there were never be alight. by knowing this concept i have to work extremely hard to achieve the goal i wanted. this sentence came along in my mind " nobody will help you when you dont work hard" " you have to continue walking till you see the light of success" simple as that when you have the authorities people around you will start to change their view of you. it mean that i have to work hard for this year and not letting anyone look down on me anymore. i dun want tis feeling anymore. it hurt simply take a knife poke inside my heart. come back to the main topic again remember andy and elaine? yeah. the first time andy lay his hand on elaine? what you told me is that you will never did it to me no matter how angry you are! and what you have just done is totally a saint. this is the third time and you expecting me to behave as before? how you want me to faced you when you promised me that no matter what you will control yourself? what is the different between you and me and andy and elaine?? the same scenario has repeated again and again. sometime i will asked myself whether are you the mr right for me or because i am staying under this roof with you? what is the thing that are dragging me back? i need an answers. do you ever think of oneday if i really leave you because of this and you will regret?? hahaha.. i guess you wont!! and i guess is okay for you to find a person again right.pinky ar, you cant depend on man anymore and have to stay strong even you are alone. there is still many thing that you can do in this world. career, career and career. bring up you living standard and you could met someone that really appreciate who you are and where you come from. no education now is okay if you willing to work hard for it and you will succeed. nobody will take away this thing you have achieve.third time and i had enough. 4 call 1 message and you stop.and this show that how caring you are, most important thing that i know the percentage that you feel guilty is only 50% i no longer important to you anymore.and you know typing out make me feel better in a way i could vent my frustration. you will never know how i feel. i am always envy when couple sitting together chatting with their friend or family and you loved one put his hand on your lap showing that i am always around. when talking and joking with them you will be very supportive and add on with me. when they ask you about things related to the topic you will be able to chip in too?? all this little little things added up to become a big issue. you will always asked me not to talk so much, when i wanted to give idea you will glance at me, when i say "ah boy also know" your ans will be " i dont know" ha...ha...ha.. funny right. this is how am i feeling right now mama has already treated me differently and you know it, but what you have done for me? i am human being, i am born by parent too, i have feeling too. nasty word and shitty stuff i never once tell you cos mama dote you alot and i dun want to give you the impression that your family is treating me differently i understand this situation better than you. cos you are a person who always have family care but i dun have. and this is the reason i want someone to be there for me when i need someone to talk to. if i cant communicate with you why you need me for?
LOVEDKathePinky
HER lOV-EDY
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PRIMA DONNAY
An Extraordinary gal who driven far to her permissivist.
Regardless of any persistence took place,
She jus simply permutation to her succeed life.
Welcome to her world started since 1988, 19DEC, Name: PINKY.(HER STORIES)
BITCHESSCREAMSY
*Japan Trip Coming SEP with BABY
(TWO MONTH LEFT) *E63 *BURBERRY wallet *Headporter Sling Bag *GUCCI WALLET *COACH BAG<
*CAT
*Driving License *MORE clothes *GUCCI handbag<
*BURN ALL EXCEESS FAT!
*FRANCE TRIP
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*TAGHAGUE *WINE fav *Gyming on Mon
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